This Christmas, I’m going to make my first home-made smoked turkey. I can’t wait to taste it. It will require getting up very early in the morning to put the turkey in the smoker, but that’s allright. I figure getting up early will allow me time to get the turkey out of the way, start a pot of coffee, and take a shower before opening presents. When it’s time to open the presents, I’ll be able to relax and enjoy it.

Today, I’m going to begin marinating the turkey in a honey brine, and I’m going to begin soaking some apple wood chips in apple juice and white wine. The honey brine will be made by boiling one gallon of water with one pound of kosher salt. After the salt is dissolved in the water, I’ll add one pound of honey, two quarts of chicken broth, and one cup of whole cloves. Once the brine is made, I’ll take the turkey out of the plastic and remove the giblet bag and the pop-up timer. Then I’ll place the turkey in the brine and immediately add some ice, as much ice as will fit in the container. The turkey will soak this way for two days, defrosting at the same time as it absorbs the flavor.

On the morning I place the turkey in the smoker, I’ll remove the apple wood chips from their bath of apple juice and white wine, and I’ll place them in the heated volcanic rock bed in the bottom of the smoker. Then I’ll add the juice and white wine to the water pan in the water pan in the smoker, instead of pouring water into it. Once I remove the turkey from its honey brine marinade, I’ll rinse it off and rub it with olive oil. After that, the only thing I’ll need to do is to refill the water pan every two or three hours. It will be easier than roasting the turkey, because I will only need to attend the bird every two or three hours rather than basting it every half hour.

I’m really excited about making my own smoked turkey for Christmas. The only reason I’m being so ambitious this year with the turkey, is that I’ve freed up some time and energy by taking a lazy approach to the goodies and sweets this year. I’ve decided that every single sweet I make will be easy; from the oatmeal-peanut butter-cocoa no-bake cookies; to the banana cream pie made with nilla wafers, sliced bananas and jello vanilla pudding. I will not even make my own graham cracker cheesecake crusts. I’m just going to use the prepared graham pie crusts from the store shelf. These can actually be cooked, I’ve learned. That way, I can still make the cheesecakes New York style, rather than making them with jello. Making them with jello doesn’t give them a very good texture, in my opinion.

UPDATE 12/26/2006: The turkey was tender and juicy. It was about a thirteen pound bird, and it took approximately nine hours to cook. It did not taste as smokey as I had expected. The meat on the wings, drumsticks and back had more smoke flavor than the breast meat. Only the the first inch of the outer layer of breast meat had an easily discernable smoke flavor. I could not taste the marinade at all, except in the drumsticks and wings. Next year, when I do this again, I’ll marinate the turkey in its honey brine twice as long before smoking it, and I’ll add more apple wood chips to the smoker after about five hours.